Farts… Now Loading


I want to fart again. It’s not like I’ve got a choice. That feeling of ease from my body every time I release the bubbly gas hiding within. I couldn’t help but smile as I felt my seat warming up in a step by step melody; I could almost control the beat – that was a few minutes ago.

Incredibly great, the release. Natural. Relieving.

Short, long, quiet, loud, whether passing by quickly or lingering a while, even poisoning the atmosphere in that confined room, you just cannot tell how it will show up, can you? Farts are surprising.

The silent one is inaudible. The long ones tend to have an increasing tones. And the short ones, even I can’t pitch that high when singing.

Well, not always though, for at times we just know the cause of it – Beans!

DAY 1 :
After eating what I’d cooked, I realized there was a lot more left.

DAY 2:
To spice up the meal, cooked rice, fried some ripe plantain and had it with some of the beans. The extra smoked salmon made the meal incredible. Still, some beans left.

DAY 3:
At about 4am during my reading session, I was extremely hungry and my stomach just couldn’t stay silent. I knew I needed something in my system. But why should I prepare anything new when there was some leftover rice and beans?
I made some beans stew from the beans and complemented it with the rice.

My stomach silenced and I was happy, but not for long; not the happiness, my silent stomach. Did I eat too much? But I don’t eat too much, I guess.

Before I could think of another cause for my stomach’s rickety mood, the fart settled. Wow!! Ooohh… what a feeling?!

And again… and again… Finally my sense of smell failed me. As to if my fart had to poison the atmosphere or stay silent; was solely dependent on the fart.

One thing I learned on my own over my conscientious years was to never over-trust a fart no matter how pleasant it may seem. Yet, anytime you hear it’s footsteps on the walls of your colon, make a conscious effort not to contain it.

Never contain a fart.

Here is where I sing he popular theme song for FROZEN “Let it go…”